Terrifying images while meditating
Happy Saturday to you all.
Over the last year I´ve decided to do a lot of work on myself after hitting a very low point in my life. I´ve read a lot on Stoicism and also on Dr Gabor Maté´s Compassionate Enquiry method. I´ve realised that to connect with my authentic self should involve facing past trauma with love. However, my mind has better defenses than Mordor and when I get deeper into meditation I begin to see terrifying images. I won´t go into what these are but be assured they immediately pull me out of the meditation. I am trying to prepare myself to face up to these images with love as I believe they are a reflection of my deep inner child. However, I am also concerned about whether this would have an effect on my psychological state.
Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
Mad respect and admiration for you @Martyn. Looks like you've been through a lot. My thoughts on your psychological state during meditation is as long as you're in full control of your mind, and knowing that you're doing this to overcome your traumas will greatly help you in the long run. Just keep pushing through and you'll fly like Space X' rocket! Keep going!
You're doing well on handling it. Don't push yourself too much. As time goes by, you can eventually overcome these past traumas. And about your psychological state, I believe in Seneca's quote that, "Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body." You can do it!
Hi @martyn! Always trust the process. Everything we do at the beginning is always hard. But eventually, you will get used to it and things will get better. I believe that in the near future, these thoughts won't pull you out of your meditation. We just need to get used to it. Just keep on doing it even though you fail from time to time.
@martyn, I admire you as well for this. You see, meditating for me is a time where we empty our mind to give it rest or to give room for new thoughts. I'm not quite sure what images you saw but if it breaks you out of meditation, then it might be a sign that you are testing the right waters. What I mean by that is, this is a wall for you when it comes to meditating, your subconscious mind is giving you the thoughts you might need to face in order to move forward.
But it's okay if it breaks your meditation from time to time. Don't rush it. Take the time and keep pushing. I'm pretty sure you can get over this or maybe accept and forgive.
@martyn Those terrifying images you see are probably your subconscious thoughts of problems you face in your daily life. I suggest you preoccupy yourself with things that can clear your mind. Like a Hike to the park, biking or any physical activities that can get yourself out of bad thinking. Always better yourself everyday cause really life is a constant struggle we must overcome each day. You always take care and hope you have a piece of mind.
@martyn Just know that those images are exactly that. They cannot touch you or harm you in any way. Much like a scary movie people jump off of their seats and yet there is no need to actually be in any fear. I would say the basis of the terror is that you are identified with the images and it holds some meaning to you somehow. To overcome this try and sit through these phases and remember that you are aware of the sensations taking place and so there will be a distance and those feelings and images may transform into something completely different. Even when there is a sense of relief do not identify with that feeling to say "I am relieved", simply notice it and continue in stillness.
Lots of good advice here, thank you. I think the images are my mind trying to tell me not to go any further. That´s all I can think of right now. However, some of your other suggestions do make me think differently. I may try to do a guided meditation to see how that turns out, with someone present to provide reassurance.